11 Warning Signs of Gaslighting in TANGLED

2020 ж. 8 Мау.
3 231 318 Рет қаралды

Mother Gothel, the villain of Disney’s Tangled, is one of the best on-screen examples of gaslighting.

Licensed therapist Jonathan Decker and filmmaker Alan Seawright break down how Gothel’s relationship with Rapunzel shows all 11 signs of gaslighting as outlined by the work of noted psychologist Dr. Stephanie A. Sarkis. And they talk about some fun tricks the filmmakers use to show just how toxic Gothel is, and how Rapunzel is finally able to free herself.

And Jonathan makes fun of Alan. And Alan's dog. They probably both deserve it.

Buy or rent Tangled here: amzn.to/30mkwS6
Or here: apple.co/376kWO5
Or watch it on Disney+

Check out our membership site! Become a Cinema Therapy Hero:
thecinematherapy.com

Get a Cinema Therapy Shirt: cottonbureau.com/products/cin...

Get some popcorn here: www.passionforpopcorn.com
Use code CTherapy at checkout for 10% off!

Set up a free consultation with Jonathan: (WE'RE SO SORRY! DUE TO OUR RECENT UNEXPECTED SURGE IN SUBS, JONATHAN'S TIME SET ASIDE FOR FREE CONSULTS IS NOW FULL)

Read the original article in Psychology Today here: www.psychologytoday.com/us/bl...

Watch Episodes of Cinema Therapy here: kzworld.info?list...

Or watch our series: Coping with Coronavirus Quarantine here: kzworld.info?list...

Cinema Therapy is:
Written by: Megan Seawright, Jonathan Decker and Alan Seawright
Produced by: Jonathan Decker, Megan Seawright & Alan Seawright
Edited by: Alan Seawright
Director of Photography: Bradley Olsen
Russian Transcription by: Alena Petriaeva
Spanish Transcription by: Juan Willems

Пікірлер
  • Hey folks, Jonathan here, trying to practice what I preach and accept feedback. Several of you have pointed out that OF COURSE you can cut ties with mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, and other family members for your own safety and emotional health. This is 100% correct. While in some (less extreme) cases of gaslighting one may choose to maintain a family relationship with the gaslighter while calling them out on it and/or holding strong boundaries, that is by no means a "you have to" situation. And sometimes breaking free and cutting off contact is an absolute must. Thank you for calling me on that.

    Cinema TherapyCinema Therapy Жыл бұрын
    • Thank you, you guys for your videos. I just love that you probably sat down with your kids and enjoyed it while also psychologically picking it apart and decided to make a video on it 🤣 You have such a lovely, warm, honest, fun and intelligent vibe. Well done 😊

      Emma D.Emma D.11 күн бұрын
    • @Sakura I guess maybe try to make sure that by the time you are 18, you are ready to leave.

      InfinitePossibilitiesInfinitePossibilities13 күн бұрын
    • I totally get you. My mother has gaslighted me before but I choose to maintain a relationship while trying to set boundaries.

      AniaAniaАй бұрын
    • My gaslighting cousin managed to completely alienate his own father in addition to me and my father, his father's brother. I believe he has Dissociative Identity Disorder. He did some of the most cruel things to me that anyone has ever done, then gave every appearance of not remembering them just a few days later. He seems genuinely bewildered by the reactions he gets to his behavior. I wish I could have helped him, but he is where he wants to be, it seems. He spent a decade in therapy, but spent most of it trying to seduce the therapist, and was deeply contemptuous of her for not giving in.

      new moonnew moonАй бұрын
    • @Joseph Raggio if you're bad at confrontation, don't confrontation them. Just leave. Don't tell them why, don't communicate, just pack your shit and go. Your life will be better for it.

      Rabbles the Binx ProductionsRabbles the Binx ProductionsАй бұрын
  • Mother Gothel is one of the scariest Disney villains because she is the most real. She could be a parent, aunt, uncle, friend, etc.

    LalupaLalupa Жыл бұрын
    • @jessicadezanove oh god- i actually knew people like that-

      Midnight DreamareMidnight Dreamare24 күн бұрын
    • Grandparents

      F L U O R O A N T I M O N I C A C I DF L U O R O A N T I M O N I C A C I D25 күн бұрын
    • @Hi I'm Kyle how are you surviving so far??

      Jean-Noel JabagiJean-Noel JabagiАй бұрын
    • @Hi I'm Kyle how are you surviving so far??

      Jean-Noel JabagiJean-Noel JabagiАй бұрын
    • Well she's basicaly my mom so

      Hi I'm KyleHi I'm KyleАй бұрын
  • This reminds me of a Reddit thread. The thread start was something like "What one thing made you realise that your parent is toxic?" and someone had commented "When we watched Tangled and during the 'Mother Knows Best' song my mother said 'Wow, she really loves her daughter!'"

    Katrus91Katrus9110 ай бұрын
    • Oh my gosh 😮

      Jazz256RoseJazz256RoseКүн бұрын
    • @JustalittleTurtle nice knowing you, Katie. I'll be keeping you in my prayers just as you're keeping me in yours :)

      Maryam ShaabanMaryam Shaaban29 күн бұрын
    • @Maryam Shaaban Thank you! You can call me Katie, it’s my nickname. And I’m sure he knows no matter how little your information is. We both have the rest of our lives ahead of us, so let’s live it the best we can manage! :)

      JustalittleTurtleJustalittleTurtle29 күн бұрын
    • @JustalittleTurtle thank you soooooo much, this means the world to me. No matter how religious or not I might be or you might be, it's incredibly soothing to know someone who doesn't even know me is willing to remember me and try to help me with whatever they can. I think it even means more when you're not THAT religious to be willing to do this for me, especially that the people who do know me and I've done what's beyond the imagination for not only didn't try to support me like you're trying to, but have hurt me immensely. And as someone who prays for safety and wellbeing as soon as I hear an ambulance or hear of a certain disaster it means even more and more. I'll be praying for you too, love. I wish you could tell me you're real name if you don't mind (because it's kind of hard to pray for that one stranger from a KZworld comment section lol) or keep it the way it is if you'd like. I'm sure God knows you by my intention towards in the prayers anyway.

      Maryam ShaabanMaryam Shaaban29 күн бұрын
    • @Maryam Shaaban You know what? And I don’t know what this might mean to you, but I feel like I should say it. I’m going to pray for you. I don’t really pray often and I tend to forget to do it, I guess I’m not very good at being religious XD. But I want to do anything I can to help you live a life you deserve. I’ll write a little note and pray that you find peace and joy in every day and the problems you currently face will be easier and easier to deal with. I don’t know how much it’ll help you, but I wanted you to know someone will always be thinking of you :)

      JustalittleTurtleJustalittleTurtle29 күн бұрын
  • Loved when Eugene used his last breath to cut the hair and set Rapunzel free. Her well being was a priority in their relationship.

    NN7 ай бұрын
    • More than his life .. he deserves rapunzel

      Su MSu MАй бұрын
    • @Lavern Merriweather You know that is a good point and it shows his character arc that he could change and seek redemption unlike mother Gothel who chose not to change.

      littlesongbird1littlesongbird14 ай бұрын
    • I think it was also redemption for him cause he spent so much of his life being a selfish jerk and now he could finally give something back.

      Lavern MerriweatherLavern Merriweather4 ай бұрын
  • "You can love someone but have really strong boundaries." THIS. THIS IS THE ANSWER I AM LOOKING FOR. This literally solves my relationship problems with my family. I realized that I still love them and I am so thankful for the sacrifices they made for me. But sometimes, what they did to hurt me still haunts to this day. For years, I am so torn of whether I will let them stay in my life or cut them off completely. You guys don't realized how happy I am to hear that. Thank you....

    アカリ 707Bangtan 진アカリ 707Bangtan 진10 ай бұрын
    • I don’t know how to do this

      Janice CyrJanice Cyr2 күн бұрын
    • Very true. Love from afar and let go and let God 🙏 is the way sometimes.

      Emma D.Emma D.11 күн бұрын
    • … i think it saved me as well😭. altho 9 months passed since this comment, praying for u moving forward!

      リ—ルリ—ル22 күн бұрын
    • What did you choose to do? I struggle with the same problem, and for a while now I’ve been convinced that once I’ve moved out and saved up enough money to pay my parents back for what money they spent on my college, I’d cut ties with them completely and request they never try to contact me. I can’t trust that they won’t continue their abuse because they always cycle back to it somehow even after going through a long run where they act like loving parents. Does setting up boundaries mean cutting them off? Or does it allow you to still see them while somehow making them adhere to your boundaries? My parents are too proud to do that last part. I really don’t want to resort to cutting them off because even after all they’ve done, I still love and care about them.

      JustalittleTurtleJustalittleTurtle29 күн бұрын
    • @Brandon Steele exactly. You give them access to you, and they slowly poison your mind. How do you protect yourself against something you can't even detect? Sure you can learn to detect it, but why devote the energy to someone like that?

      Anna CastroAnna CastroАй бұрын
  • In "Gaslight", the lowering of the gaslight was actually the woman's clue that her husband was lying. The gas lighting would dim if gas was also being used in another room; when her husband was supposed to be out, the dimming of the gas light tells her he is still in the house. And she figures out the whole plot.

    TheFirstManticoreTheFirstManticore10 ай бұрын
    • That’s a really smart touch from a Director’s and cinematographer’s perspective

      Overseeer2579Overseeer25793 күн бұрын
    • @Dragonair Dragon The first time I heard the term was maybe 1 or 2 years ago and I thought it was a a new term made up by feminist. Just like Simp , I thought it was a new term

      K'ant.K'ant.Ай бұрын
    • This movie gaslight is available free on KZworld

      Su MSu MАй бұрын
    • @Marcos Bustos bottom but wanting to seem alpha energy

      yinyin3 ай бұрын
    • @Mae Ikaa damn that was good. If only we could see your words cutting him deep

      CharlieBityBytesCharlieBityBytes4 ай бұрын
  • The moment Gothel sang, "You're gettin' kind of chubby." to Rapunzel my dad gasped, covered his face with his hands as he cringed, and exclaimed, "Oh my God. What an EVIL woman!" He was so appalled that a "mother" would ever dare say that to her daughter. 🤣 (I love my dad. He's such a sweetheart.)

    Silver Samurai026Silver Samurai026 Жыл бұрын
    • @Niggita Dragun that’s even more disgusting for a “mother” to say to a daughter

      never gonna give you upnever gonna give you up2 күн бұрын
    • From what this comment says he's a good dad

      brodie forresterbrodie forrester6 күн бұрын
    • lmao my mom says that to me and my brother without hesitation most of the time it’s jokingly and sometimes she does it without saying it (ex: hey dear you cheeks are kind of more round aren’t they?)

      Bom bom bakudan!Bom bom bakudan!15 күн бұрын
    • It's going to sored itselfe out,😊😊 it's going to be alright.

      Idk ?Idk ?17 күн бұрын
    • Your body is not HES business,WTF? Your health

      Idk ?Idk ?17 күн бұрын
  • When tangled came out, I was obsessed with this movie. My mom, who is a narcissist, would get upset when I'd watch it so she ended up throwing the DVD away. My sister got me a new one later ☺️

    ScribbfishScribbfish5 ай бұрын
    • Ha! My mom hates the movie for the same reason. She says it “teaches kids to hate their parents”

      AzelmaSimpliceAzelmaSimplice13 күн бұрын
    • Oh my God

      no nameno name14 күн бұрын
    • Guys, if you're worried about them sabotaging your CD. Just lie. It doesn't have to be a big lie, it can be subtle. "I a lot of ways, I like Rapunzel's hair more before it was cut" Narc interprets: the hair should have stayed. Your in intention: it was shiny and fun for R to play with. "Mother Gothel kept Rapunzel safe from sunburns" Narc Int: Gothel was right. Your Intention: R wasn't allowed the normal mistakes of life. "I can see why mother Gothel valued her looks so much." Narc interprets: she's pretty. Your Intention: all she has is her looks. It's surprisingly easy to do, because Narcs love to talk over you, so if you just start talking they'll take over. Then when you smile at what they say, it will be sincere because you know they'll let you keep the movie.

      Kat KitKat Kit17 күн бұрын
    • @Rachel Erin I think so ❤️

      ScribbfishScribbfishАй бұрын
    • Good sister :)

      Rachel ErinRachel ErinАй бұрын
  • 13:10 that moment where Rapunzel say "Did I mumble Mother?" was so powerful. I feel like she realized and fully committed to "This is toxic for me." and actually stood up for herself.

    josephsbaejosephsbae8 ай бұрын
    • @elissaluvscats She even straightens her back a little, pulling herself up to her full height. (6/18/2022)

      Danielle MusellaDanielle MusellaАй бұрын
  • Interesting detail I noticed: during "Mother Knows Best", Mother Gothel repeatedly extinguishes the candles within the tower, which may actually be a direct reference to "Gaslighting".

    Alexis VandomAlexis Vandom10 ай бұрын
    • @Alicja K Layered metaphors are the friggin best man

      MagicRainbow KittiesMagicRainbow Kitties21 күн бұрын
    • @Alicja K still fun to read into in all the ways though. I like both.

      Moss; RIP Alex\TechnoMoss; RIP Alex\TechnoАй бұрын
    • I'd say it was more to highlight that she was keeping Repunzel in the dark.

      Alicja KAlicja KАй бұрын
    • Yeah I think she hits 11/11 points because the writers specifically looked them up in developing her character

      HorseGirlbHorseGirlb2 ай бұрын
    • gasunlighting

      natxonnatxon3 ай бұрын
  • The quick talking, the rolling or the eyes, the constant and yet subtle form of degrading…no wonder she scared me so much as a kid, she’s the most life-like Disney villain we’ve had in a while

    Dani CDani C5 ай бұрын
    • she's the scariest villain because she can exist in real life

      Tide Pod Pad ThaiTide Pod Pad Thai18 күн бұрын
    • I remember hearing how a lot of people had got up and walked out of the theater early in the movie because the Mother Gothel scenes were too real and traumatic that they couldn’t keep watching. That’s how well Disney nailed it.

      KelKel2 ай бұрын
    • This film is apparently too Violent for little kids.

      Eduardo ViajeroEduardo Viajero3 ай бұрын
  • Mother gothel actually teaches kids a lesson, kids see so much physical violence in movies that they are never taught about the mental, and won’t know if it’s normal.

    No offence, butNo offence, but Жыл бұрын
    • Yeah this movie came out when I was 10, and I remember saying to my sister one of the interesting things was that Mother Gothel was "nice" to Rapunzel most of the time, and that's why Rapunzel stayed. I'd watched the barbie version of Rapunzel a few years before, and in that Mothel Gothel is much more a classic version of a villain who keeps Rapunzel trapped and actively prevents her from escaping and is much more explicitly awful to Rapunzel (still a fun movie tho), so Tangled contrasted my knowledge of the story. But in Tangled, Gothel is just "kind" and "loving" enough that Rapunzel didn't even want to leave even though she could, and only took the first step when she had someone with her. And that's almost more insidious, because even Rapunzel didn't recognize that Gothel never actually cared for her until the end.

      saturnsaturn3 ай бұрын
    • @Jo' Denise not in anime or the MCU.

      GGA007GamingGGA007Gaming3 ай бұрын
    • @No offence, but I love your Piu Piu dp he’s so cute

      RelicRelic3 ай бұрын
    • Now, a year later, kids are faking all this shit.

      Mark WoodvalleyMark Woodvalley3 ай бұрын
  • So I watched this with my 16 year old son who was confused on why Mother Gothel was considered a villain. He felt all she did for Rapunzel was out of love. It opened up a very reachable moment to my son which helped me realize why predators often go for young children, since they can’t see the darkness and manipulation without outside help

    MomOfTheForestMomOfTheForest3 ай бұрын
    • @Marian Fierro 16 is still young

      Silent°RavenSilent°Raven17 күн бұрын
    • 16? Young children?

      Marian FierroMarian Fierro28 күн бұрын
    • @Carmen Macias I’m pretty sure that’s why the beginning of the film exists at all. To paint her as the bad guy.

      Cryptic-LemonCryptic-LemonАй бұрын
    • @Cryptic-Lemon yes but in his mind he could think "oh she did a bad thing but still loves her". You dont think theyre the bad guy unless someone explicitly tells you why theyre the bad guy.

      Carmen MaciasCarmen MaciasАй бұрын
    • Did your 16 year old child not watch the first five minutes of the film? Where she literally steals a baby for her hair 😭😭😭

      Cryptic-LemonCryptic-LemonАй бұрын
  • I remember spending time at a friend's house as a kid and watching insane levels of gaslighting and emotional manipulation used between EVERYONE. It felt like nothing was ever done out of genuine love, care, or responsibility, but always out of guilt, anxiety, or anger. What made me realize was when he would come over to my house and say "It's so peaceful over here...."

    Alex BensonAlex Benson10 ай бұрын
    • that's horrifying

      e t h e r e a le t h e r e a l29 күн бұрын
    • @Amanda Dorothy Anderson see I think I'm in a similar situation, I'm pretty sure there's some not good stuff going on in my house but I really don't have any friends to compare my experience to theirs and even the times I have hung out at other people's houses and observed hoe their parents treat them I don't know if I can take that as truth because my parents act completely differently when people are over verses when it's just our family so who knows if other families are just like that and what I see when I'm over at other's houses isn't what's actually going on and they are actually like my family but don't show it when others are around. It doesn't help that my parents literally tell me that "all families are like this" and when I say none of my friends families seem to act like this they say like "well you don't know if they're different when you're not around" and all that stuff. Really does make me question my reality :/

      Kat SwishyatKat SwishyatАй бұрын
    • That kid is me. I was not really allowed to go to my friends' house that much but every time I did go, I'd feel so loved and accepted, everyone seemed kind and I would wish to have an environment like that at my home. Thought my family was normal until my friends started pointing out the toxic things happening in my family. Also my friends would be so shocked every time I told them something happening at home and I'd think "huhhh is it that bad? I thought it happened in every family?". My parents also say all the toxic stuff is normal and "out of love". I'm 18 now, and still not even allowed to use my phone properly T_T I have to use it according to the time limit set by them

      Insert UsernameInsert UsernameАй бұрын
    • Wow. Reading this comment actually made me realise that my best friend’s mum has been gaslighting her her whole life.

      oooooooooo3 ай бұрын
    • @Kristel Pi omg same!!!

      HeyokannikaHeyokannika4 ай бұрын
  • My dad was a victim of narcissistic abuse for all of his childhood and teenage years. It's "rubbed off" on him a bit, and he has a few of the traits. He admitted once that he does gaslight, and I can tell he's trying to heal himself. I know keeping my distance in some ways is still important, but I'm proud of him for doing his best to fight the lingering effects of mental and emotional abuse. Narcissism is VERY real and I loved how it was portrayed in a Disney movie

    oompa_loompaoompa_loompa7 ай бұрын
    • Wow, your dad is so powerful to be able to say out loud that he has gaslighted! For most people, even to admit to Being gaslighted is difficult to 'mumble.' I think he has a real chance of ceasing to gaslight. My best wishes for both of you.

      Rebecca ConklinRebecca Conklin3 ай бұрын
    • OMG! I have twice dated and once befriend a Narcissit and after my now ex friend discarded me I with drew because I was worried about some if his traits rubbing off on me (for example, a part of me wanted to call him about for trying to hook up with me while he had a gf his own age which he lied to me about and I realized that could be seen as smearing and would make me no better than him).

      littlesongbird1littlesongbird14 ай бұрын
  • I love the moment when Flynn says “a little rebellion is good, healthy even” because it is statement suggesting that rebellion is a natural part of life.

    Samuel MackenzieSamuel Mackenzie3 ай бұрын
  • I love Mother Gothel. She’s such a well written villain. No exaggerated violence or brute force, just pure manipulation. She’s so realistic, watching the movie now that I’m older makes me so uneasy. Especially when she berates Rapunzel’s beauty, all because she’s insecure of her own age and aging process. One of the best Disney villains, imo.

    dreamsmasher505dreamsmasher505 Жыл бұрын
    • The nail in the coffin was stabbing Eugene

      Pippa SchroederPippa Schroeder6 ай бұрын
    • @thefluffuniverse yeah she did somehow

      Joy DorsettJoy Dorsett6 ай бұрын
    • So you actually like people like this?! Ok then, better stay away from you...

      ThatOnePipsqueakThatOnePipsqueak7 ай бұрын
    • @Eva the idiot I don’t know why I’ve never noticed how manipulative Ursula was. I need to watch The Little Mermaid again!

      dreamsmasher505dreamsmasher5057 ай бұрын
    • Ursala the sea witch also manipulates Ariel at the beginning by taking her at her lowest point and convincing her that everyone else doesn't understand and she can trust her

      Eva the idiotEva the idiot7 ай бұрын
  • i remember watching this in theatres as a kid and having my narcissistic gaslighting mother sitting beside me thinking the mother knows best song was the best thing in the world… obviously back then i didn’t understand our relationship and thought it was normal but it still made me feel uneasy seeing how much joy that scene brought her.

    marsbarsmarsbars9 ай бұрын
    • @blah blahblah thank you, i major in psychology at university and the career path im planning to go down now is one that will help me help others with mental health struggles so that means a lot :)

      marsbarsmarsbars3 ай бұрын
    • @Sumaiya Latheef (SLX__13) thank you so much :)

      marsbarsmarsbars5 ай бұрын
    • @marsbars Don't apologize for long comments; I do that as well. And I'm sorry you're still in that position. I'm also a college student living at home, and I can't move out until I get married, though I am lucky to not have narcissistic family members. I hope you'll be able to live without her and get some space between you two soon.

      Sumaiya Latheef (SLX__13)Sumaiya Latheef (SLX__13)5 ай бұрын
    • @Sumaiya Latheef (SLX__13) nah i still live under her roof as a college student. that’s kinda how families work in my culture, nobody moves out until they’re married. my siblings and i have learnt to live with her tho, we understand she’s unlikely to change her behavior/beliefs so we watch our words / actions around her. it sounds exhausting and sad but i can’t really do anything about it and i had to accept that as a teenager so that i wouldn’t have to keep building up resentment in my heart for her. it’s difficult but i try not to take anything she says to heart and i stopped trying to change her a long time ago bc that’s something only she can do for herself unfortunately. she still controls my life and i kinda grew up to be a person who’s incapable of living without her so as much as i would like her gone, i can’t really live my current life without her help. i’m undiagnosed autistic and she wouldn’t take me to a psychologist as a kid when my teachers suggested i get checked out so you can imagine that gave me many problems asw and she contributed a lot to my meltdowns growing up and now too. for the most part i don’t think my mom has ill intentions when interacting with me, most of it i think is just her projecting onto me so i try to remember that i’m not actually the problem. i talk to her in a way that kinda shuts her down and you could say it’s manipulative too but i’m doing it for my own protection. unfortunately, moving away isn’t an option that many people have so learning to live with your narcissistic parent just makes your overall quality of life better and less stressful- it won’t make your problems go away, but you’ll be better equipped to deal with them and that’ll save you a lot of mental exhaustion. i appreciate the concern tho so thank you for that :)

      marsbarsmarsbars5 ай бұрын
    • That's terrifying. Clearly she didn't have any remorse trying to control you, at least at that time. Were you able to get away?

      Sumaiya Latheef (SLX__13)Sumaiya Latheef (SLX__13)5 ай бұрын
  • Thing is, I never thought Gothel was evil until the end. "But she's saying she loves her. Even though she wants the flower, it looks like she loves Rapunzel!" Imagine my surprise when I found out I was being gaslit since childhood by the very same person I watched the movie with ._.

    BamideleBamidele4 ай бұрын
    • I WAS LOOKING FOR THIS! this is the same exact way except my mom related to how mother gothel was. She is atleast not as bad but she doubts some things I can do

      JoshJoshАй бұрын
    • @Kailee Rose Nah, she was like, "wow....whelp, great movie!"

      BamideleBamideleАй бұрын
    • @Loch She loved what Rapunzel could do for her lol

      BamideleBamideleАй бұрын
    • I still think Gothel loved Rapunzel. Rapunzel is the only close person to her, and Gothel looked after her for 18 years. And... It takes A LOT of consious effort to teach the kid how to read, how to talk... To feed, to keep taking care about Rapunzel. Of course it was messed up, of course Gothel is a terrible mather, a narcissist, and she hurt Rapunzel really bad. And she killed Flynn, too, lol. But I still think that Gothel loved Rapunzel. She was a bad, a horrible person (although who knows how good anyone would be, living for HUNDREDS of years, so...)

      LochLochАй бұрын
    • bet you the whole time that person was agreeing with you like “exactly, she’s not evil, she really does love rapunzel!” to credit themselves🥲

      Kailee RoseKailee RoseАй бұрын
  • I was recently re-watching The Emperor's New Groove and I noticed how every problem the characters in it encounter is caused by someone's ego. Kuzco's ego makes him put his wants above all of his people's needs which is signified through all the trouble he causes for Pacha and his family, and Yzma's egotistical desires to be empress leads to her causing Kronk to have constant moral dilemmas between who he truly is/wants to be and how Yzma wants him to behave as her henchman. I'd love to see a video of your opinions on this movie and these issues!

    Sierra's A SmartassSierra's A Smartass8 ай бұрын
    • Definitely. The whole message of the movie is “Don’t be selfish. Actually be kind to and think about others and their wants and needs,” which Kuzco learns, if not begrudgingly, and Izma never does, to the point where not only does she always talk about how everything and everyone affects her, she literally, physically steps on her own sidekick, Kronk, who even points out her selfishness, and this ofc makes it totally believable that he’d turn against her by the end

      Overseeer2579Overseeer25793 күн бұрын
    • Not true. throughout most of the movie, half of all the inconveniences the characters face are random and outside of anyone's control. Yzma's betrayel of Kuzco had nothing to do with his ego nor his bad actions, he was the emperor and it was in his right to fire her for not respecting his title. She just so happened to be too egotistical to accept his tittle and so, she attempted to kill him in a very impersonal fashion. Kuzco actually surviving was something neither Kuzco or Yzma predicted or expected, it was random. The shenanigans at their final confrontation (minus that one scene) were completely random and neither side winning meant much more than sheer luck. That's the point of the movie, it's a fun, short and cool little story packed with a good message between the comedic madness. There's really not that much to it.

      Gus CferGus Cfer5 ай бұрын
    • That is an excellent episode. Suggestion.

      Alaljar EnsiAlaljar Ensi7 ай бұрын
  • Shortly after watching this episode, I rewatched The Hunchback of Notre Dame and my brain made the connection that Judge Frollo is also a gaslighter and has completely gaslit the heck out of Quasimodo. Quasimodo's actions and thought process about leaving the bell tower made so much more sense after that!

    Aubrey CarterAubrey Carter9 ай бұрын
    • @Ines 04 He makes that clear, by not allowing Quasimodo to call him "Papa" or "Father", despite claiming that he was quote, "raising you as my son." Instead, he wants to be referred to as "Master", which tells you everything about how he still views this young man, despite the fact that twenty years have gone by. (8/10/2022)

      Danielle MusellaDanielle Musella7 күн бұрын
    • Frollo maybe is worse, because he says how he is his only friend and ally, but never says "I love you", he always saw a monster, not a person

      Ines 04Ines 047 күн бұрын
    • Judge Frollo is super gaslighting Quasi. I can't believe Quasi would sing "I am deformed" and "I am ugly" in agreement. I noticed this as an adult, but as a child I just loved the music and normalized this, wtf haha.

      Mónica LeónMónica León19 күн бұрын
    • @Kevin 080592 @AubreyCarter I've seen an AWESOME tribute video here on KZworld, combining footage from "Tangled" with the "Out There" segment from "Hunchback". (6/18/2022)

      Danielle MusellaDanielle MusellaАй бұрын
    • Saamme!!.. and both of the villains' deaths is that they fell off from a high place

      Kevin 080592Kevin 0805924 ай бұрын
  • This analysis just proves even more why Gothel is the darkest of all the Disney Villains. Which is why she remains my favorite.

    David StoneDavid Stone Жыл бұрын
    • for me it is still Frolo, but she is the second one

      MrYulchaMrYulcha2 ай бұрын
    • @erdem kara A year too late to reply but I agree with your comments. They didn't sound condescending at all and mentioned plenty of better examples of a darker villain, nice job!

      Monkey 30000Monkey 300002 ай бұрын
    • @Starlight_Feather actually just a correction maleficent does have a motive, revenge, she was hurt and so she cursed to kids whos father hurt her to get to him. The curse wasn't just for laughs

      V a n i l l a R o s eV a n i l l a R o s e Жыл бұрын
    • @erdem kara You’re really out here trying to pick fights over disney movies huh. Relax dude, it’s all well and good to have discussions but don’t go actin like your opinions are the end-all. It’s fiction

      bananasinfrenchbananasinfrench Жыл бұрын
    • @erdem kara I'm very aware of "The Rescuers Down Under", but how many McLeeches or Shan Yus do you run into on the street every day? Yes, they exist, but they're incredibly rare. What makes Gothel so dark is that (lockdown notwithstanding) you WILL have met someone like her recently; you may even know someone like her on a first-name basis. When we talk about heroes, we often like to talk about the courage and selflessness of ordinary people, but when it comes to villains, we tend to jump straight for the cartoonishly evil caricatures. Gothel isn't that: she's an example of the cruelty and selfishness of ordinary people. Her evil is quiet, it's inconspicuous, and it could well be happening right next door. I don't know about you, but I'm fairly certain I'm not sharing a wall with Genghis Khan.

      18Hongo18Hongo Жыл бұрын
  • When this episode first came out, I only wanted to hear about it, because I didn’t understand the term “gaslighting”. Now, just these short five months later, my life has been changed in a fundamental way… I was being manipulated by an addict. You two are helping, more than I can express in a YT comment. Thank You.

    Val’s PTSDVal’s PTSD10 ай бұрын
    • I wish you the best dear

      Fabienne SchallerFabienne Schaller3 ай бұрын
    • @Isabel Huang yes. Thank You.

      Val’s PTSDVal’s PTSD5 ай бұрын
    • Hope you're doing better

      Isabel HuangIsabel Huang5 ай бұрын
  • When Mother Gothel says, “I love you.” She’s always talking to Rapunzel’s hair, touching her hair, and kissing her hair.

    Lynn T. RomanLynn T. Roman10 ай бұрын
    • @Nuclear Cat Baby I am so sorry you had to go through that. There is nothing wrong with foster parents getting money to help with the costs of a foster child (food, clothing, medical bills, etc. add up) but sadly I have heard some heartbreaking stories about foster parents exploiting foster children for $ and in some cases the foster parents were not financially struggling (not that would justify exploiting a child who has already been through a horrible time) I have however, met foster parents who do honestly love and care for the foster children just as much as if they were their own child and the world needs more of them. I also feel your pain because I feel like my mom just wanted me for the child support from my dad.

      littlesongbird1littlesongbird14 ай бұрын
    • My foster parent loved the check she was paid by the government (she could have gotten it even as an adult if I were under conservatorship)

      Nuclear Cat BabyNuclear Cat Baby4 ай бұрын
    • They said that

      C C.C C.6 ай бұрын
  • This movie came out when I was 11 years old and I remember watching it over and over again, because somehow it gave me a lot of comfort during a pretty hard time with my family. I moved out when I was 17 and I'm still in thr process of figuring out all of the abuse. Then, about a year ago I watched this movie again and I suddenly understood why I connected to it so well: because this is what happened to me for my entire childhood and seeing Rapunzel breaking free gave me hope that I could do the same thing. So yeah, I love this movie

    Emily BastongEmily Bastong7 ай бұрын
    • You know, I remember seeing another person mention a similar situation. They LOVED the movie moana, and would watch it frequently! She mentioned at the time being in an abusive relationship with her romantic partner, and seeing it brought her confort. After a few years/months she broke up with him she realized why she liked it so much. I guess your brain just clicks the two things together without you realizing it. Its amazing how you were able to escape that horrible situation, and hope youre doing better :)

      Carmen MaciasCarmen MaciasАй бұрын
  • I love that in modern Disney movies the villains are not ugly, disfigured, or clearly malevolent. They are subtle. You can't generally just look at someone and tell they are no good.

    Tony FriendlyTony Friendly5 ай бұрын
  • People say that mother gothel wasn’t actually a bad villain but they don’t realize how much mental and psychological damage she did to Rapunzel

    Cassia _04Cassia _04 Жыл бұрын
    • Exactly. It proves how good Gothel is at manipulating. She made some viewers think she cares about Rapunzel. She doesn’t. It also shows how people still defend abusers and don’t think twice about the ones affected by the person.

      Canvas_1Canvas_1 Жыл бұрын
    • Exactly how my mother was. "She was looking out for my best interest" she never physically hit me ever.

      Jennifer AshfordJennifer Ashford Жыл бұрын
    • @Nantae Spoiler for the TV show

      GreyBlueMeGreyBlueMe Жыл бұрын
    • and one would actually know if they've experienced it in real life too, like I have.

      RosamyRosamy Жыл бұрын
    • @Novemberian excuse me? Bio daugther? WHAT?

      NantaeNantae Жыл бұрын
  • When this movie came out, I thought Mother Gothel was a normal mom up until the ending scene. I agreed with people saying she truly did love Rapunzel and I think that just highlights how much my own mother was gaslighting me. It wasn't until I went to college and started putting distance between her and I, and relying on other people. My mom fits all 11 of those too and I'm so much better away from her.

    Savannah WatsonSavannah Watson10 ай бұрын
    • That's so nice! I heard that our lives changes for the best when we leave them! I am in the process. Can't wait to open! It will be soon

      Beatriz RamosBeatriz Ramos7 күн бұрын
  • To be honest, I love Gothel as a character. She's so realistic, compared to majority of the disney characters. She lies, she manipulates, she acts normal, she acts insane. She's not just Evil character, she has a whole personality that makes her in that specific relationship a bas guy, but really there is so much more to her than just classic villain.

    VendettaVendetta2 ай бұрын
  • This hit me like a pile of bricks. I've been gaslighted by a so called friend. This friend used me for my talents, bad -mouthed everyone else in our community, turned my partner against me (they were friends long before we started dating), made me think I'm unstable and don't have a clear prospection of realty to the point I started seeing a therapist. She would call me after every therapy section to ask what we talked about and got horribly mad if I denied her any details. I was also miserable at my job at the time. I switched careers and started to regain my confidence. The more I found my footing, the angrier she got but it also broke some of the hold she had on me. By the end she was calling my partner trying to get him to break up with me right when he was about to propose. Thankfully her hold on him also diminished and we both cut ties with her. I'm horrified that I called this person a friend but thankful I got rid of this toxic presence in my life.

    13myrrh13myrrh10 ай бұрын
    • Sounds like a friend of mine: he was an older musician who kept promising to let me be a vocalist in his band and help me learn more songs while I was helping him promote/market his band and doing his website. He later tossed me aside when he met a teenage girl whose parents were connected so she had a lot of publicity and a strong following (though to be fair, she was and still is an amazing talent) and denied that I was ever promised anything by him. Years later we crossed paths and he once again tried to manipulate me and gas light me and even discarded me. Joke was on him: I realized he was just as pathetic now as he was when I was younger (60 years old never married nor had a gf for more than a few months, can't keep a friend for more than a couple of years, couldn't even keep his band together after his one bandmate who in reality was the one everyone liked because he was a kind person where as my friend was a jerk, etc.) and I realized most of the people who know him aren't really close friends of his.

      littlesongbird1littlesongbird14 ай бұрын
  • "The world is full of horrible, selfish people..." It's the one time that Mother Gothel tells the truth, and she's talking about herself.

    M BadgerM Badger2 ай бұрын
  • The scariest thing about Mother Gothel is seeing how the abusive aspects about her reflect on some real life people, mothers or otherwise. Which is what makes her a great, realistic villain as well.

    elenoidelenoid8 ай бұрын
  • When Mother Goethel says "I love you most", she's petting Rapunzel's hair. The hair is who she's talking to. She doesn't give a damn about Rapunzel as a person, a daughter, a human being. She is always reduced to her hair, which is what makes cutting it off such a radical act.

    BeautyBotBeautyBot9 ай бұрын
  • I just watched Tangled for the first time the other night, and it was really interesting because I saw things in Mother Gothel and Rapunzel's relationship that were like me and my grandmother. I won't get into all the details, but when she said called Rapunzel fragile, and talked about how she wouldn't survive on her own, it was exactly the message my grandmother passed to me but in a more overt way. I also really related to the mumbling thing. I mumbled in front of my grandmother all the time, which I now know was because I was afraid of speaking up around her, and it made her mad. I only wish now that I had realized this earlier- because I don't believe anything she did was malicious- but I now don't have the option to heal it with her because she died last month.

    TBT tubeTBT tube10 ай бұрын
    • It doesn't always have to be exactly gaslighting though, it can also be a thing of extremely high expectations that are impossible to meet, making you feel small and fragile. Encanto's Abuela is a good example of this. She wasn't gaslighting her family, but she WAS setting way too high a standard so that everyone felt constantly stressed in trying to keep up with her expectations. Abuela is different though because she really did love her family, only she had her own trauma and anxieties that shaped her behaviour. It's still damaging to the people around her, but there's a big difference because one is pure selfish controlling narcissism while the other is behaviour shaped by trauma, but still well intentioned. I don't know your grandmother of course but I recognise some of the behaviour you describe in my own grandmother, who has also passed away. My condolences for you, I hope you don't blame yourself for not being able to heal your relationship with her before she died. It might help to think about her intentions but it's not on you to fix everything, just be kind to yourself

      Femke van DroogeFemke van DroogeАй бұрын
    • Wow. I actually experienced it with my father in childhood, luckily my mom was strong enough to let us out of this mess.

      panda girl xoxopanda girl xoxo3 ай бұрын
  • as someone with an abusive mother, i felt so proud of rapunzel in the "did i mumble, mother?" moment. its really hard to stand up to someone like that. every time i did my mother would get extremely aggressive. it was her way of scaring me into submission.

    jaime evermorejaime evermore7 ай бұрын
  • Tangled. The movie that helped a generation to ask. "...Wait, this behavior isn't normal?"

    Zephyrus_anim8Zephyrus_anim8 Жыл бұрын
    • @paintted doctor ramani's youtube channel might help you unlearn some more of that gaslighting.

      Kat KitKat Kit17 күн бұрын
    • @Victoria Birney Agreed...

      Silent°RavenSilent°Raven17 күн бұрын
    • My covert malevolent narcissistic mother tells me to watch disney and only disney forever! It was disney that helped me thank outside the BOX! Ha HA!

      stephen harrisonstephen harrison6 ай бұрын
    • Ans Disney will not ever make another film like it because they've integrated gaslighting into movie scripts.

      Terry FishTerry Fish6 ай бұрын
  • We should be talking more about the "heavy sheltering" portrayed in the movie, it was plain and simple isolation.

    Germán RivasGermán Rivas8 ай бұрын
  • I remember the day I told my husband "Mother Gothel is not that bad. She never hits Repunzel, she bought her books, taught her to read, buys her paints, and supports her hobbies, and she knows what Repunzel likes to eat. My mom didn't do any of that, even though I was never allowed to leave." and everything about my childhood clicked into place and I went to therapy.

    Lora KaneLora Kane7 ай бұрын
    • I think Tangled was a great way for children and adults alike to realize that they have been subjected to manipulation.

      Noah LaniNoah Lani19 күн бұрын
  • I went through a bad marriage break-up a few years ago. The children stayed with my ex for the most part. The problem was that she was constantly gas-lighting them when they were not visiting with me. When I asked them about how they felt, they said that when they were with their Mom, it was constant confusion and anxiety. When they were with me, they felt calm and focused. I was supposed to be the bad guy being a recovering addict and all, but, I was also the same guy that was getting help, finding self-acceptance and striving to be a better person every day. On the other side, not so much.

    Surfer DudeSurfer Dude4 ай бұрын
  • I watched this film as a teen with my mother. We exchanged a look at “love you more/love you most” since I grew up with us saying that but. We haven’t exchanged that line since. Granted it gave me anxiety as a kid and teen, and guilt that we just. Dropped it. We also so rarely just say a basic “I love you” since watching this movie…and to be frank it was only ever said with a “more/most/infinity! Infinity times infinity!” And as the film went on…it was painful to watch. Obviously my mother didn’t intentionally do these things to hurt me like Gothel did, but there’s still far too many similarities. Like Rapunzel I am nearly agoraphobic (exclusively with going out Alone but yeah. It’s cranked up to 60 from how it actually feels. It sucks, it’s hard to fight, and it’s not Entirely from Nowhere-I have, say, had “men with pointy teeth” attempt to groom&grope at every job I’ve worked at, and had to deal with that sort of behavior since the “old” age of 12. I’m terrified of it progressing past that. And I do get lost easily. So that cripples a sense of independence.) Fortunately my parents do acknowledge the agoraphobia thing…ALMOST. They’ll let me use a GPS to drive, but constantly say me wanting to walk is “stupid and dangerous.” But…at some point…I HAVE to be able to do it? I’m an *adult.* But their fears just cripple me despite them almost resenting me at times for being anxious to the point of being a shutin + some sort of physical disability causing perpetual unemployment (I have medicaid; I’m working on sorting it and my mental health.) But…yeah. This film is so difficult to watch, and it was definitely like having a bag of dirty laundry exposed (but closer to thinking it’s “clean” laundry verses deliberately hiding it knowing it’s rank with week old dirty underwear.)

    Anonymous FellowAnonymous Fellow5 ай бұрын
  • Best advice my therapist ever gave me: Just because you love someone does not mean they have earned your vulnerability

    Theia MoonTheia Moon Жыл бұрын
    • amen

      StarKnightStarKnightАй бұрын
    • Nice

      Ian ValmontIan ValmontАй бұрын
    • Damn

      KitCat898KitCat8982 ай бұрын
    • Well said!

      Lyndsay BrownLyndsay Brown7 ай бұрын
    • Damn

      Silent°RavenSilent°Raven7 ай бұрын
  • 'Fun' story about this movie: When this came out in 2010 I went to see it in the theatres with my 'mother', and related so much to the movie that we bought it as soon as it came out on DVD. At the time I couldn't place why I related to it so much, until one day I was watching it, and my 'mother' came down to where I was, sang along, left, then used the song later on to tell me that she was right about something and try and convince me not to make a decision. After that I ended up seeing a lot of what my family was doing to me the intergenerational abuse that was happening, and began to work on myself and the trauma. For about 4 or 5 years (when I was older) I did my best to try and help my family heal but they never did. I kept a surface relationship with them until the end of 2020, where I went to visit them with my husband, and they ended up abusing me once more. I have not had contact with them in almost a year, and it's so freeing to not feel like I'm insane, or that people suddenly hate me after having conversation with my 'mother'. She also hits either 10 or 11 out of these.

    Shae CarbaughShae Carbaugh8 ай бұрын
  • Gothel is such a real character that it scares me that it actually made me confuse at first if she was a "good" parent for keeping rapunzel in and protecting her It took me such a while to realize her actions were awful and manipulative

    DanFranDanFran7 ай бұрын
  • I was obsessed with this movie as a little girl and never knew why. I just related to Rapunzel a lot. That's when I eventually realized my mother was the actual Mother Gothel who kept me stuck inside the house. She hits me, threatens me, gaslights me, etc. Luckily my dad realizes that and is working to not be like my mother and get away from her to help me and my younger siblings. I don't have a Prince Charming or Flynn Rider in this case, but who says you need a spouse to come rescue you when you have family that you trust?

    JustARandomGamerGirlChillingOnYouTubeJustARandomGamerGirlChillingOnYouTube2 ай бұрын
    • It’s good that you have a family member who can support you and take you away from that toxicity.

      Noah LaniNoah Lani19 күн бұрын
    • hope your situation improves. get help. how old are you?

      The Stahl Family CircusThe Stahl Family CircusАй бұрын
  • She always reminded me of my own mother, gaslighting and all. It took me into my late teens to notice just how much and why, and why I always had such strong mixed feelings about her. This movie is beautifully done.

    Wonky BeansWonky Beans5 ай бұрын
  • Notice that when Gothel says "I love you most" she kisses Rapunzel's hair. That's what she really loves.

    LadyEvilestLadyEvilest Жыл бұрын
    • yeah, read that in every article that mentions rapunzel ever

      Life ThoughtsLife Thoughts10 күн бұрын
    • this was covered in the video i believe

      ꒰ ୨୧ᵕ̤ᴗᵕ̤ ꒱ gianna꒰ ୨୧ᵕ̤ᴗᵕ̤ ꒱ gianna14 күн бұрын
    • @Seth Feldpausch Document everything; record calls, emails, convos where she does this, and offer to testify on your brother's behalf, or at least give it to his attorney. That and being there for them both are the two biggest ways you can help them. God Bless.

      Alexis GrundenAlexis Grunden Жыл бұрын
    • @Alexis Grunden It freaking tears me apart inside to see children being psychologically abused like this. My brother has been going through a nasty divorce and his soon to be ex(and my former sister in law) is constantly doing this to my poor niece. I always have to assure her that she is strong and capable, but her mother has her believing that she’s worthless😥. Narcissistic control freaks are some of the worst people man! Especially when they hurt children! All I can hope is that my brother gets custody and we can help to counteract some of the severe mental trauma that has been done to her!

      Seth FeldpauschSeth Feldpausch Жыл бұрын
    • Catra's blue eye Catra's blue eye But will the power of the flower remains strong and doesn’t fade? 🤔 Especially if the child she gives birth is a boy, it will be difficult in the future since the one that will get pregnant is another girl (?)

      MintMint Жыл бұрын
  • Gothel is interesting to me because every time I question "where does the greedy witch end and where does the overbearing mother begin?" You don't take care of a kid for somewhere around 20 years and don't feel something and she does give a nugget of truth in that people would come after her if they found out her power as she did it herself while I'm excusing anything she's certainly a character I wish I could read their inner thoughts.

    Logan's WalkLogan's Walk5 ай бұрын
    • She loves Rapunzel’s gift, not Rapunzel herself

      Normal HumanNormal HumanАй бұрын
  • On the topic of gaslighting, the entire Harry Potter franchise has multiple examples of gaslighting. I'd love to see your take on the 8 movies.

    Dominic NevinsDominic Nevins2 ай бұрын
  • I've had a few in my life. Broken free of most. Still trying to figure out the original one. I think what's a good analogy is that gaslighter's often drain the life of their victims because they're looking for love and validation. Which Gothel literally needs Repunzel's hair to live. Another classic fantasy archetype for the gaslighter would be the vampire. They drain the life from their victims, using allure, seduction, charm, deception and mind control in order for their victims to be lured to their death or enslavement.

    Jason SmithJason Smith4 ай бұрын
  • The crazy thing is that Mother Gothel might have gotten away with her plan for who knows how long if she had just given Rapunzel a different birthday. Rapunzel might have eventually tried to escape but her big reason for leaving was the lights that appeared only on her birthday.

    Justin HamannJustin Hamann3 ай бұрын
  • I think one of the biggest tell-tale signs is that you feel free and happy when you’re away from them, but the moment they’re around, you instantly switch to your childlike guarded, weak self.

    Ying'er (Perfume lady)Ying'er (Perfume lady) Жыл бұрын
    • omg i felt like this since i was a CHILD! everytime i was outside with my friends (no matter the place) i felt so much happy because i could be 100% myself, but as soon as i came back home where my parents were i would feel HORRIBLE like a cloud of negativity was above me :(

      emanuelleemanuelle3 ай бұрын
    • Sadly this is how I feel with my husband... I feel like I would be a million times happier without him around because I would be free from the gaslighting and controlling and yelling... But I feel guilty because I have two kids and I dont want them to suffer or have less because I need to get away... Im just afraid that I wont be able to make it without him... He treats them nicely but not me... I dont even know why he is that way toward me...

      LyssAzaeliaaLyssAzaeliaa3 ай бұрын
    • Yikes

      lexlexlexlex4 ай бұрын
    • Hmmmm... Sounds like my mom 😭

      Kevin 080592Kevin 0805924 ай бұрын
    • @Gia Saleen ya I straight up wanna fight a Nigga too

      Stephen BecerraStephen Becerra4 ай бұрын
  • This is the nature of my relationship with my mother, I was able to realize it only after getting out from under her roof and having someone else to see it firsthand and point it out to me. Something I do have to point out here is the part about "if they don't realize they're doing it, they'll probably be horrified and want to try to fix it." This would be an ideal situation, but in a lot of cases, it's pretty much impossible to get this to happen. For example, if the person is a narcissist (like my mother), they're likely to believe that they can do no wrong, and try to make excuses in their own defense if you confront them about the gaslighting. Sometimes they will gaslight you even further by telling you they've never gaslit you. It's very hard to get such people to go to therapy or even accept that they need it. My mom wouldn't even let *me* go to therapy when I voiced a need for it as a teen because of the (completely unjustified) social stigma around mental illness.

    boudicaa stormboudicaa storm4 ай бұрын
  • "Mother knows best." "Just do what I tell you to do". "It's only me who loves you. No one else does." These are the messages my mum constantly sent me as a child either verbally or non verbally. Now I live in another country, cut any contact with her and any other member of my extended family, and I am now 65 years old, but I am still not sure if there is anyone in the world who loves me except for my cat.

    Noriko SatoNoriko Sato3 ай бұрын
    • I actually have that feeling with my cats too. It is really hard to believe other people care about me, but I know my cats do

      e t h e r e a le t h e r e a l29 күн бұрын
  • My stepmom openly relates to Mother Gothel. She's gaslighting me into believing I'm giving her the stigmatized stepmother treatment when she's become the abusive stepmother that my mon had in her generation. How am I just realizing this after 9 years?

    Eileen ButterflyEileen Butterfly2 ай бұрын
  • This hits really hard for me now Cause back as a kid and when this was first released I was watching it on DVD with my parents and my dad said “your mom is like mother gothel who knows you might be kidnapped too” years later I reflected and realized how abusive my mom is and how she gaslights me and after watching this she really is like mother gothel She’s my mom but being around her isn’t good for me I kinda feel how Rapunzel feels now

    MushroooomMushroooom10 ай бұрын
  • It's sad that they didn't mention Pascal as "another voice," who was trying all along to get her out of the abuse but didn't have the proper voice to do so.

    Amy KinzAmy Kinz Жыл бұрын
    • Wow. This is so meaningful, thank you for opening my eyes

      miapeaiamariamiapeaiamaria4 ай бұрын
    • @sunflower he's a chameleon

      Tide Pod Pad ThaiTide Pod Pad Thai5 ай бұрын
    • @sunflower thats a chameleon 🤨

      Yoongi TrashYoongi Trash7 ай бұрын
    • @Primac Carolina ok pies and cookies i dont think u understand what a pick me girl is but whatever

      s♡s♡ Жыл бұрын
    • @s♡ oh look a pick me girl

      Primac CarolinaPrimac Carolina Жыл бұрын
  • I grew up with a gaslighter. My aunt gaslighted me for most of my life. She made me feel like I needed her to live and that I’d never know what to do without her. She also made me feel like my physical appearance was bad but she also made me think everyone around me was out to get me. She exaggerated how bad the world was. She made me feel that the rest of my family was using me and they didn’t truly love me, only she did. She also told me all men were bad and made me avoid any male figure in my family even my own brother who lived with me and any guy I came across with on the streets, even if it was a cashier at a grocery store or a gasoline station. She’d make up random things about them that didn’t even happen, trying to make it look like they were hurting me or trying to hurt me somehow, and when I made a friend at school, I would tell her about it and she would tell me to leave them because they were only going to hurt me and she constantly told me that she was my best and only friend. I couldn’t sleep at night. I was constantly anxious and stressed thinking about how anyone was out to get me and that she was the only one who was truly there for me. One day I found out that the world wasn’t what she made it to be, and I figured out that I was actually getting gaslighted, I distanced myself from her and that made her desperate and mad and she was trying anything she could to get me under her control again, to the point where she called me egotistical and crazy and many other things that I knew I wasn’t until I left. She was mother gothel. And that’s why tangled is my favorite Disney movie because I relate to it so much. Edit: btw I tried many times to make her see what she was doing to me but she refused to change. Leaving was the best thing I did for my mental health. I now treat everyone equally and have a loving family with my husband and I’m not afraid anymore.

    Mouse PatMouse Pat8 ай бұрын
  • My mom always accuses me of turning against her, 'making an enemy of her,' and _imagining_ that doing things I enjoy helps me hold onto my will to live. One day she was talking about 'my little friends' ('a pack of flighty, manipulative airheads who can't express real love') and she accused me of seeing her, 'Like that Cinema Therapy episode about Tangled, that wretched old woman.' I hadn't seen this episode when she accused me. Now, at her mention, I have.

    DensoroDensoro3 ай бұрын
  • My kids think I’m silly when I say mother Gothel is my most despised Disney villain, but that’s because they never had to live with someone like her. She gives me chills and makes me enraged. I’ll take a plain spoken villain any day over this manipulation and dishonesty.

    Talitha LeahTalitha Leah4 ай бұрын
  • 8 months no contact with my Mother Gothel, got a gaslighting card in the mail again today. This video is one of my all-time favorite YT publications . . . thank you so much for making this. I've shared it many times. This video helps people.

    Bridget RandlesBridget Randles10 ай бұрын
  • This is insanely relatable. Johnathan mentioned that it was "a cult of 1", I was raised in a cult and I can def relate to so many of these comments! Wow, these guys are incredible!

    Sarah BSarah B3 ай бұрын
  • i remember watching tangled as a kid and knowing that gothel was the villain but never quite seeing all the signs…rewatched it today and caught onto just about everything you guys mentioned. she’s a perfectly executed realistic villain

    Rebekah Ryan YoungRebekah Ryan YoungАй бұрын
  • When Mother Gothel makes Rapunzel believe Eugene is leaving her and stealing her crown thats cruel. But I imagine that Gothel saw it as the only way to get her 'possesion' to stay with her. I love Mother Gothels character as shes so well written.

    Amanda WoolleyAmanda Woolley10 ай бұрын
  • One other thing about gaslighting is that it happens almost entirely via one on one conversations, and is thus extremely hard to prove for the victim (unless it happened in an online chat or similar). If gaslighting happens in your workspace, try to document it or record it if you have the means, as soon as you realize they are trying to manipulate you. Also, try to always have a witness or not to be alone with them. Try to find other victims. Usually, a gaslighter is not just gaslighting you. I know, this is far easier said than done. I was finally freed just a few months ago from such a coworker that was gaslighting me for at least three years thanks to the testimony of his previous victims in the same company.

    mini meimini mei7 ай бұрын
  • And this is why it drives me up a wall every time someone goes "But I'm sure Mother Gothel loved Rapunzel deep down!" *facepalm*

    Jade OttselJade Ottsel Жыл бұрын
    • Maybe she did love rapunzel, it’s the people who think that matters that are the scariest. I bet if hitler rose today, he’d have swarms of people saying “but he loved dogs!” “But he fought for animal rights!” “But he loved his home, he was just trying to help!”. A few cherry picked positive traits doesn’t make a good or even sympathetic person. People do that with story Villains and even with real people

      Morning GloomMorning GloomАй бұрын
    • It’s hard for some people to understand evil and that’s a good thing to a point

      Jodee SmithJodee SmithАй бұрын
    • Is everyone forgetting that Mother Gothel actually has a REAL daughter? Like a biological one?? She literally abandoned her and went to Rapunzel, She also gaslighted her into thinking she’ll come back like, that’s messed up

      haha Yuckhaha YuckАй бұрын
    • That's what my clueless grandparents thought while I was being abused by my foster parent.

      Nuclear Cat BabyNuclear Cat Baby4 ай бұрын
    • Right! She doesn’t care about her at all, she only took her because her hair is magic.

      Zoe CagleZoe Cagle5 ай бұрын
  • Thank you so much. I have escaped a lifelong gaslighter (who I had to live with for 22 years) only a few months ago, and this is putting so much more in perspective than I had already discovered. Your channel does great things and I'm proud to be subscribed

    MysterySteveMysterySteve6 ай бұрын
  • Thank you for this. I haven't cried this much over a KZworld video in a long time. I always compared my own mother to Gothel but now I better understand why I made that association in the first place.

    Amanda HillAmanda HillАй бұрын
    • You are so welcome. :)

      Cinema TherapyCinema TherapyАй бұрын
  • I have always loved this movie ever since I saw it in theaters as a kid! I remember Gothel's character came to me as sort of a shock because I was expecting her to be like the typical evil mothers in other Disney movies such as Cinderella and Snow White, but instead I was conflicted because she had what I thought was the same sense of humor as my parents. This movie helped me be able to see the toxicity of my parents. My dad was the worse because he would intentionally gaslight me by humiliating me in order to make me think that I have to be reliant on him for what was true and not and he would do the same sort of "I'm just teasing" thing Gothel did at the beginning of the film. Thankfully around the time of the release of Tangled my parents got a divorce and my mom got full custody. I am still very conflicted with my relationship with my mom because she had suffered from the abuse of both her father and my father, so I guess she picked up her toxic traits from that which makes me feel sorry for her, but I don't think she should be treating us the same way. If I disagree with her or any of her views, she would talk about how I don't know anything. When I argue against those notions, she talks about how both of my sisters agree with her (which they do because we have all learned that we will be villainized if we disagree with her, like I literally had my eldest sister apologize for telling the truth which supported my argument) and then talk about how my disagreement is tearing apart the family (often using the Mother Gothel ploy "Great, now I'm the bad guy" ). When I would get the closest to winning an argument and keeping her in the room after she becomes super angry and yells at me, she would then go "Oh honey, I know why you probably can't handle these things, you're autistic" and then go on this faux rant about how I need to accept that I will never be normal (a.k.a., never competent) because I am autistic. I am very worried right now because I still have to stay with her for at least two more years in order to finish college, get a job, and find a place to move to, and also she has recently moved me and my sisters to a very isolated area that is on the opposite side of the country of all of my friends, and part of me still believes in all the stuff she has said to me. But I think if I continue to try and tell myself the truth, I may be able to someday leave my tower and maybe find myself a friend like Eugene! Thank you so much for the video!

    Grace StitzerGrace StitzerАй бұрын
  • I was raised by a Mother Gothel.. literally my grandmother adopted me and I didn't know she was my grandmother until I was 12. I 'escaped the tower' when I was 19 and I'm now 32, no contact with her, and in a good career and working through the impact of my upbringing - there was quite a bit of effort and self-reflection required to make any real progress in healing. So if you were also raised by a mother gothel, just know you can survive this it just takes time, patience, compassion for yourself, and work.

    JayJay5 ай бұрын
  • ok is no one gonna talk about how badass the “did i mumble mother” is. it’s literally the disney princess version of “did i stutter bitch”

    Rashmi PatelRashmi Patel Жыл бұрын
    • huh wdym its alr been talked abt

      ꒰ ୨୧ᵕ̤ᴗᵕ̤ ꒱ gianna꒰ ୨୧ᵕ̤ᴗᵕ̤ ꒱ gianna14 күн бұрын
    • @Falling Petunias You are also wrong though, a period is just a dot, and one can totally use the word "dot" to mean "period" in that context.

      CrazyOrcCrazyOrcАй бұрын
    • @E.K Liadon Cope

      Christer JacksonChrister Jackson2 ай бұрын
    • @Elizabeth Bennet why are you telling at this person? They ain't say anything wrong

      E.K LiadonE.K Liadon2 ай бұрын
    • @Christer Jackson I like how when you "corrected" the grammar you're still wrong.

      E.K LiadonE.K Liadon2 ай бұрын
  • I think it's important when watching this movie and analyzing it for signs of abuse in your own life, to remember that the biggest sign is that mother Gothel lies. Several of the things she says are things real loving mothers would do. "I love you most", isn't an inherently problematic thing to say. What makes it abuse is that mother gothel lies

    RainAngel111RainAngel1114 ай бұрын
  • Tangled is an amazing movie and it did teach me what gaslighting was and it did help my friend get out of a toxic relationship, but can I just say that when I was younger that mother gothel’s death scared me so badly, the way her eyes are shown in the broken mirror and the way she screams as she falls still scares me to this day-

    A.M. talksA.M. talks9 күн бұрын
  • Holy crap! I have felt guilty forever for having a surface layer relationship with a gaslighter and THEY make me feel guilty for having a surface layer relationship with them and I have thought (for *decades*) that I was wrong for it. THANK YOU for letting me see the light (LOL that ties back to a Tangled song!) No wonder I have loved this movie so freaking much! But seriously, thank you, guys! I have felt more relief and healing in the couple of days since first watching you than I have in a very long time!!!

    Tammy CoxTammy Cox7 ай бұрын
  • When I first watched "Tangled" and saw (heard) Mother Gothel singing her song, I ABSOLUTELY DID NOT SEE ANYTHING WRONG WITH IT! Precisely because my family gaslighted me for so many decades but I did not know I was psychologically abused. And they would feel bad why I see a psychiatrist.

    Shirley MonrealShirley MonrealАй бұрын
  • To be clear, Gothel never actually tells Rapunzel she loves her. Every time she says it, she's looking at Rapunzel's hair, not her.

    KryptoFreak405KryptoFreak405 Жыл бұрын
    • Hmmm good point! I never thought about that! 🤔

      Angela CavonAngela Cavon Жыл бұрын
    • @athena that's cute

      LolitaLolita Жыл бұрын
    • And Eugene always moves her hair out of the way to get to her

      athenaathena Жыл бұрын
    • Yes, she does.

      Alfred HitchcookAlfred Hitchcook Жыл бұрын
    • I was looking for a comment like that! Exactly, all her affections are pointed at her hair only.

      N. ValN. Val Жыл бұрын
  • Damn. This has me realizing a lot about my past relationships in both friends and family. This video helped me learn a bit more about behaviors from traumatic experiences, thanks :) I've been out of my parent's house for the first time since November and I've been doing a lot of self reflection and a LOT has come up that my brain just hasn't given a second thought to. I was abused by my cousin growing up and she did a lot of these things as well as an ex best friend and others. (My cousin kind of set the standard for the people I was around...) While I was never outright abused by my parents, and I still love them dearly, they do have some toxic traits in them as well as emotionally neglecting me, even to this day because they don't know any better. The whole projecting their own insecurities onto me is definitely there as well as alienating anything that's considered "abnormal" to them. I've been around the same people for so long just like Repunzel and being away from them has had a similar effect on me! While it's been really hard and has been beating the shit out of me emotionally, it's extremely refreshing to get to think things over and process them.

    Elliot McIdiotElliot McIdiot5 ай бұрын
  • Watching this feels like a slap in the face.... Because every single action that has been explained in this video is what my mother has been doing my whole life (I'm sure it wasn't intentional), and now that I moved out for uni I've been feeling very good but guilty at the same time and I'm starting to understand why ....this is weird

    IoMIoM8 ай бұрын
  • When I was a kid, I loved that movie so much. Years later I realized that it was because that movie represented my life and I understand everything now that I've grown up

    Elisa ClaesElisa ClaesАй бұрын
  • I’m still struggling with my own relationship with my mom, who I can now acknowledge gaslight, emotionally abused, and criminally neglected me as a child. She’s gone as far as getting my partners number and trying to tell them bad things about me without my knowledge. My partner is amazingly kind he’s been very supportive of me and I’m trying to establish boundaries but it’s hard cause sometimes I feel like I’m going on autopilot when I talk to her, I’ll accidentally give information I didn’t mean to and I don’t know how to better stop doing that, part of the reason I feel badly about this is it puts a lot of stress on my partner. She constantly tries to get info on him, his parents, what work they do, etc even going as far to look up flight information. Now I know that if I want to have a full life at some point I need to set boundaries and frankly I’ve encouraged other family members to do the same, because of her actions most of my younger cousins aren’t allowed to be alone with her anymore, I wouldn’t want my children alone with her either hell I don’t want her at my wedding. The only thing I wish you guys talked about more was HOW to establish those boundaries especially if your larger family either only acknowledges part of the problem (like mine) or believes family ties are more important. My partners mom constantly asks why I don’t mend things with my mom and she is of the mindset that no matter what a person does you have to love and respect parents

    ShortTBoneShortTBone4 ай бұрын
  • I think Pascel is the voice in someone's mind who's getting gaslighted. The tiny one that wants to get out of the tower (the toxic relationship) but always gets ignored or suppressed.

    flower queenflower queen Жыл бұрын
    • as someone who is an ex cult member, I can say for sure, you feel like you don't have a voice at all, with mormonism (the cult I'm from) a good example of this is that, if you don't follow everything the prophet says to a T, then you aren't going to be getting into the celestial kingdom (or as I like to call it, Super VIP Heaven)

      BeowolfBeowolf Жыл бұрын
    • That's a really good insight. It also helps that at the end, it was Pascal who made Mother Gothel trip and fall off the tower.

      Dammit DeniseDammit Denise Жыл бұрын
    • Yes I agree because In the beginning inside the tower he’s mostly ignored and once she’s out he has more physical impact in the story and as she grows emotionally so does his affect in the story, the last trip to end gothels rein I love that thought

      A’DiamondA’Diamond Жыл бұрын
    • I like that! Also pascal didn’t like Flynn which I think is smart because once you are distrustful of your gaslighter that can transition into distrust of anyone who shows interest in you

      Caroline C.Caroline C. Жыл бұрын
    • theres a comment exactly like this one 🤦

      kimlipeatingmangokimlipeatingmango Жыл бұрын
KZworld